Mark Clark [00:00:03]:
First Corinthians, chapter seven is where we are. And this is kind of a part two of what I want to do on relationships. And so last time, last week, we hit on the idea of marriage and we talked about the importance of marriage. And I shared eight things about marriage. And now I want to go in almost the opposite direction because the apostle Paul does, and he talks about the opposite of marriage, which is singleness. And he says a couple things about it which are really important because we tend to treat single singleness almost like single people in the church have leprosy. And we're like, hey, there's something wrong with you if you're single, if you're not married, you know, stay away from that guy. Cause there must be something wrong with him.
Mark Clark [00:00:44]:
And we all. And what Paul does here is vastly interesting, is he flips it on us. And he says that this whole kind of modern evangelical conservative church culture that really values family, family, family all the time versus singleness has got it wrong. And he flips it around. And so it's very interesting. He says in the Unmarried or Betrothed. So he starts over here, chapter seven, verse six. So we ended at verse five where he talked about marriage and how good it is and how it's for pleasure and protection and procreation, all these wonderful things.
Mark Clark [00:01:15]:
And now he says, now he pivots verse 6. Now, as a concession, not a command, he's kind of saying, hey, I'm talking out loud here. I'm not necessarily saying that every nuance of every. What I'm saying, it came from me, from the Lord. I'm just kind of talking out loud as a missiological thinker about what would work good and what. And he says, not a command. So I'm just kind of saying here, I say this. I wish that all were as myself am and as he self is, is single.
Mark Clark [00:01:44]:
But each has his own gift from God. Now, there's gifts in the Bible, right? There's like. And the minute anybody hears about the gift of singleness, they start freaking out, all right? And they're like, every 20 year old's like, lord, give me administration, give me a teaching gift, give me tongues, give me mercy. Do not give me the gift of singleness. I just denounce that in the name of Christ. So I understand that. But he's saying, man, you know what? There's some people who have this wiring and ability to be single as he self is one of one kind and one of another. And then he says this to the unmarried and the Widows, I say that it's good for them to remain single.
Mark Clark [00:02:26]:
I mean, this is crazy. This is blowing your mind. The master class of life. You did not think the Bible was gonna go here. You're going along, you're like, okay, Jesus and money and family and parenting. And we talk about all those things. Now the Bible pivots and does this. Very interesting.
Mark Clark [00:02:39]:
I want you to remain single as I am. All right? Now, there's barely any sermons on this. And the reason is he's trying to say there's a goodness in it, but the church. See, this teaching is insanely counterintuitive to two groups of people in the church. The first group of people in the.
Unidentified [00:03:00]:
Church, it's counterintuitive to.
Mark Clark [00:03:02]:
Are conservative Christians, modern day conservative Christians, because we tend to get very hopped up about family, and family becomes everything. Having kids, having family. That's what I just. My wife and I just went and spoke down in Sacramento at a church at a marriage conference. And we got there and we thought this was like, last weekend. So we thought there'd be like, you know, a few hundred people there, big church, you know, blah, blah, you know, marriage conference. Only the married people are coming.
Unidentified [00:03:29]:
There was.
Mark Clark [00:03:30]:
The guy calls me a couple minutes, he's like, hey, there's a lineup around the building. There's 2,200 people at this marriage conference that you and your wife are speaking at. I'm like, sweet. So imagine, though, that this was a.
Unidentified [00:03:41]:
Singles conference and I showed up to.
Mark Clark [00:03:43]:
Do a conference on singleness. There'd probably be 12 people in the audience, right? Like a janitor pushing a mop, like, in the background. It'd be, like, echoey and dense. Because no one's, like, showing up to the singles conference. No one's. Because that's the way the modern church is. We value family. We pump family.
Mark Clark [00:04:00]:
We do sermon series on family and marriage all the time. And that's kind of what we do. But Paul says, I hope you will remain single as I am, but if they cannot exercise self control, they should marry. I love this. He basically says this. The only people who should marry are people who are. They can't have any. They don't have any self control sexually over them.
Mark Clark [00:04:21]:
So just. See, here's the crazy part. We often view singleness as weak. He flips it on us and goes, no, no, married people are weak. All the married people in the room just look around at each other. All right? Look. Look at each other.
Unidentified [00:04:35]:
All right?
Mark Clark [00:04:35]:
You are all the people who are basically too horny. Sorry. I did not mean to say that. My brain was like, too what?
Unidentified [00:04:44]:
Too what?
Mark Clark [00:04:45]:
Too what? You just couldn't have any self control in your life. All right, that's what he means. We'll delete that later.
Unidentified [00:04:52]:
All right?
Mark Clark [00:04:53]:
You just didn't have any self control. You're so weak that you had to get married. That's what he's saying. The opposite of what the church says, right? Oh, you're single, you're weak. I can't believe it. You must not be able to. He goes, yeah, the only who get married are people who lack self control. People are like, I just can't.
Mark Clark [00:05:09]:
I don't have no self mastery. So I have to get married. I have to get married. And so Paul says, man, this isn't always good because. And he says, they should marry, for it's better to marry than to burn with passion. You bunch of crazy kids. You get married to lock yourself down so you're not just running around burning with passion everywhere. So that's his point.
Mark Clark [00:05:30]:
And the reality is, is you have conservative churches that are offended by this, that are scandalized by this entire message. But he says it's actually normal. Some of the healthiest, most producing people.
Unidentified [00:05:44]:
I know in my life personally are people who are single, people who have.
Mark Clark [00:05:48]:
Dedicated themself, whether they're missionaries, whether they're people in ministry in some capacity, or whether they're just living life and they've made Jesus a priority, whether they're young adults. Some of the most flourishing, mature Christians I know are young adults on mission. So I'm wearing this vsaum jacket. Vsaum is a ministry that we do as a church village School of ministry. And what it basically does is it looks at young people who are coming out of high school and this bridge year for them, and it gives them a year of ministry and education. And so I wanna just celebrate that. We've had 39. So there's two versions of the village school of ministry.
Mark Clark [00:06:30]:
The first one is this year, we've had 39 people come through, come out of high school, spend a year doing ministry, learning theology, hermeneutics, apologetics, Old Testament, New Testament, systematic theology. They go on a mission trip. And so we're actually taking applications for that for the next year. You can go online thisvillagechurch.com VSOM if you're a student and you're going, I'm not sure what I wanna do. I wanna do ministry for a year. And they all get planted in a ministry. But here's a bunch of single Kids coming out of high school trying to figure out what to do. And they've dedicated their time and their energy to ministry.
Mark Clark [00:07:07]:
And then there's a second branch of it which is a master's degree. And so when I did a master's degree, it was all head knowledge. So we decided to create a master's degree that would actually produce good pastors, good pastor theologians who not only learned theology, but did it in the context of ministry. And so we have six master's students at Village Church right now. And if you're looking to get a master's degree, be in ministry full time, a pastor and grow into that, you can apply to that same. And so this is where our pastors come from, is coming through Vsaum and understanding. Here's what theology is, here's what ministry is. It's actually a brilliant ministry guy named Victor Maynard, one of our guys, runs it.
Mark Clark [00:07:43]:
He's an amazing leader and has structured this from the bottom up because we were trying to deal with a need which was the church doesn't have theological minded, good leaders in Canada, but it also doesn't have practitioners and practical people. So my point is that when we look into that, Paul is setting himself up as an example. And I look at all these students who've dedicated their time, their energy, they go on these mission trips at the end, it's an amazing experience. You should sign up for it, get your kid too. But they're single and they've dedicated all this time and energy and mind, body, soul to the service of Jesus. And Paul's saying, look, yes, there's people who get married because they lack self control. I get it, it happens. And he says, but I want you to be free.
Mark Clark [00:08:26]:
Now here's his point of the goodness of singleness. He goes, I want you to be free from anxieties.
Unidentified [00:08:31]:
All right?
Mark Clark [00:08:32]:
Now I know some of you, you're married, you're like, I don't have an anxiety. I don't know what he's talking about. Right, honey?
Unidentified [00:08:37]:
Right.
Mark Clark [00:08:38]:
But the unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord like he's got on their mind, like ministry and life and mission and theology and reaching people for Jesus, the unmarried person is freed up to have that kind of life. I remember when I, before I was married, before I was even dating seriously, I became a Christian. And what was my life about? I would walk around, I would tell people about Jesus. I would just walk around my town smoking cigarettes at two o' clock in the morning, walking up to people and just praying for Them leading them to Jesus. I'd walk up to groups of drunk people. I'd be like, I need to tell you about Jesus. They're all smoking weed. It's like, okay, cool, let's go.
Mark Clark [00:09:16]:
This might make sense even more to you. Cause Jesus was kind of a hippie. And they're like, what? And so we would talk about the kingdom of God and the way things work and how they had to repent of sin. And people come to know Jesus. I would do that. And I could just do anything I wanted. Here's what I didn't have. I didn't have a person calling me up saying, where are you? I'm scared.
Mark Clark [00:09:38]:
I'm nervous about where I could just hang. I could hang out with anybody. Or I could hang out with prostitutes if I wanted. And spend time with them and tell them now, if I hung out with prostitutes, people would be like, you have a job. You're a pastor. You have a wife. No prostitutes. Fine.
Mark Clark [00:09:53]:
All right. But the reality is, if you're free, you don't have any of these responsibilities. You are freed up to be radical, revolutionary for Jesus at all times. But when you get married, he says, here's what starts to happen. You start to be anxious about worldly things. You start to care about, like, mortgages and love languages. And you start arguing about curtains and plates and whether you should redo your kitchen and all this just domesticated suburban nonsense. And he's saying, I want you to be freed up to do the things of the Lord.
Mark Clark [00:10:30]:
I want you to be freed up to do mission. And so the reality is, these are two worlds. I used to have this kind of life, and now I just tell people about Jesus. Now what do I do? My weekends, I cut the grass, right?
Unidentified [00:10:45]:
That's what I do. I fix cupboards and stuff with my Saturdays. That's what I do. You get domesticated, man.
Mark Clark [00:10:54]:
That's what happens. You start worrying about worldly things. You start getting divorces. You start ruining each other's lives. You start hating each other. You gotta raise kids. All these, what Paul says are civilian pursuits in another one of his letters, like I think about.
Unidentified [00:11:13]:
We were flying.
Mark Clark [00:11:14]:
To Dubai for the mission trip to.
Unidentified [00:11:16]:
Uganda a month or so ago. And on the way there. So it's got a 15 and a half hour flight. And so we're flying there. And I was like, about halfway through the flight, it's probably. I don't know what time it was. Probably 11:30, 12 at night. And I was watching a movie or whatever, and I went up to the.
Mark Clark [00:11:32]:
Go to the bathroom.
Unidentified [00:11:33]:
And there was these two guys sitting right in these kind of front seats.
Mark Clark [00:11:36]:
And then there was the bathroom area. Big, big open space.
Unidentified [00:11:39]:
And I just started chatting with them.
Mark Clark [00:11:41]:
Cause I was waiting for the bathroom.
Unidentified [00:11:42]:
One guy's like, hey, I'm a Muslim.
Mark Clark [00:11:43]:
Guy, and I'm going to Dubai.
Unidentified [00:11:45]:
And the other guy's like, I'm a Hindu guy.
Mark Clark [00:11:46]:
And so I'm like, okay, let's lay.
Unidentified [00:11:48]:
It down right here.
Mark Clark [00:11:49]:
All right?
Unidentified [00:11:49]:
So.
Mark Clark [00:11:52]:
I just, like, stood there, all right? And we're chilling and we're chatting, and then this thing falls over on the guy's foot. And the airline's like, I'm so sorry, sir. And he's like, I'm a lawyer. You spilled that on the wrong foot. I'm gonna start. You know. He starts into this, and they're like, oh, can I bring you anything? He's like, yeah, I want champagne for me and my friends, all right? And they're like, yes, sir. So there I am, 12.
Mark Clark [00:12:13]:
We're all drinking champagne at the front of the. Hey, let's talk. And all of a sudden, I say, hey, I wanna talk to these guys about Jesus. And so I started talking about, what are your Muslim believers? I'm a pastor. I never told him I was a pastor. I was a Christian. And we started talking about theology. And then the Hindu guy, I'm like, what about karma? And we start comparing the Quran to the New Testament and Muhammad and to Jesus.
Mark Clark [00:12:32]:
And we're talking about the sacred scriptures of Hinduism and karma, philosophy and evil and suffering. And we're doing all this stuff. I'm up there for an hour and a half. I'm standing just like. We're having a ton of fun. And I can look back and I see my wife, and she's giving me that look, like. And I'm like, what's wrong? What's going on? And so she's like, come back. And then I go back and what? And she's like, well, you.
Unidentified [00:12:59]:
You.
Mark Clark [00:12:59]:
Hayden wants to go to sleep, and she can't sleep with you up there talking.
Unidentified [00:13:03]:
I'm like, why? She's like, Cause the whole plane can hear you.
Mark Clark [00:13:07]:
I'm like, really? This is legit. I'm going back.
Unidentified [00:13:10]:
All right?
Mark Clark [00:13:10]:
And I went back, and I just started giving her, right? This is the reality of sin and depravity and heaven and hell and the guy. And see. See what's going on there is the tension, all right? I'm doing what the Lord's got me doing. And my wife's trying to domesticate me. All right, Come sit down and shut up, because no one wants to hear.
Unidentified [00:13:29]:
Your voice, all right?
Mark Clark [00:13:30]:
This is the tension of marriage. You're going to start going after civilian pursuits. People are going to want to domesticate you. They're going to bring you down. They're going to put you in a box that you stay here. This is what Paul's saying, man. You're single, you don't care. You got no response.
Mark Clark [00:13:43]:
You can riff in any plane you want about anything you want. You got nobody telling you to sit down. That's in the Greek. That's what he's trying to say, right? And so he's trying to say, listen, you can't. You know, I looked at this week. There was this. It's sad, man.
Unidentified [00:14:02]:
There's this Instagram account that popped up this week. It's called Preachers and Sneakers, all right?
Mark Clark [00:14:06]:
And it's crazy.
Unidentified [00:14:07]:
It's blowing up. And it's basically this Christian guy who posts pictures of preachers, famous preachers in the US and they've posted pictures of.
Mark Clark [00:14:15]:
Themself, or they've got pictures of them preaching.
Unidentified [00:14:19]:
And he puts the. He takes a picture of them, and.
Mark Clark [00:14:21]:
Then he shows the retail value of.
Unidentified [00:14:23]:
The shoes that they're wearing and the clothes that they're wearing. And it's like.
Mark Clark [00:14:27]:
It's crazy, right? Like, we're talking $750 Nikes, $980 US Gucci pants, $3,000 jackets that they're wearing in front of everybody. And he posts $5,000 shoes. Like, crazy town, right? And so everyone's kind of on this thing, looking at all these pastors. And what's crazy about it is, I look at these pastors, I don't care.
Unidentified [00:14:50]:
To get into how they got the money and book deals and all that stuff.
Mark Clark [00:14:53]:
Whatever.
Unidentified [00:14:53]:
I don't care about that.
Mark Clark [00:14:54]:
It's more about. I look at these guys, and these.
Unidentified [00:14:57]:
Are the same guys who used to write books about how we have to be undomesticated and we have to be.
Mark Clark [00:15:02]:
Raw and we're called to be revolutionaries in the world, and we should never hold onto the things of the world.
Unidentified [00:15:07]:
And I look at them now, and I'm like, dude, you've lost your way. You've become domesticated. The things of the world are so comfortable and easy. It's just. Oh, it's so nice. I like this. There's this tension. This is what he's talking about.
Mark Clark [00:15:23]:
There happens to be things in our.
Unidentified [00:15:25]:
Life that will domesticate us, that will.
Mark Clark [00:15:27]:
Bring us into worldly things that will make us begin to think that this is the stuff that matters. And he's going, single people aren't like that. They got all the time in the world to be like Jesus. What do you want me to do right now? Wake me up at 2 in the morning and tell me to go talk to someone. All right, I'll go talk to anybody about Jesus you want. Let's do it. That's how I used to be.
Unidentified [00:15:47]:
And now.
Mark Clark [00:15:50]:
Hi, neighbor.
Unidentified [00:15:53]:
Oh, yeah, gas prices are bad.
Mark Clark [00:15:56]:
What's the weather look like this week?
Unidentified [00:15:58]:
Mm.
Mark Clark [00:16:00]:
Right. That's my life now, civilian pursuits.
Unidentified [00:16:08]:
And he's going, you single, you have the ability to be anywhere you want, whenever you want. This is what he's trying to say. Think of the pie chart of your life, those of you who are married, how much time on mission and ministry versus your kids, your spouse, schooling, distractions, he says, from the things of the kingdom at time. And so he says the option of singleness is actually brilliant. And he's saying, because it actually does missiological things. Marriage, as we've talked about, is a momentary blessing. Jesus wasn't married. The apostle Paul wasn't married.
Unidentified [00:16:45]:
In fact, Christianity in the marketplace of.
Mark Clark [00:16:48]:
Ideas in the ancient world was very unique because every conservative religion in the world tells you to have kids, because.
Unidentified [00:16:55]:
If you have kids, then your message can live on in the next generation.
Mark Clark [00:16:59]:
And every ancient society needed kids because.
Unidentified [00:17:02]:
It was about honor, it was about money, it was about security, it was.
Mark Clark [00:17:06]:
About safety, it was about having kids in the farm.
Unidentified [00:17:09]:
And that can actually, like, you know.
Mark Clark [00:17:11]:
Do the crops and have. And you can have a future. You can deposit yourself into the future by having kids. And Christianity comes on the scene and unique in the marketplace of ideas. Its founder is single, and its biggest theologian that writes 13 letters of the New Testament is single. And they look and they say within Christianity and within kingdom, singleness is actually an option. And his point is this.
Unidentified [00:17:42]:
Stanley Hauervas actually says this.
Mark Clark [00:17:44]:
This is a challenge not only to.
Unidentified [00:17:45]:
Conservative culture, of course, this whole idea.
Mark Clark [00:17:47]:
But the second group it's a challenge.
Unidentified [00:17:49]:
To is secular culture.
Mark Clark [00:17:52]:
Because secular culture loves the idea in society of having the honor of having.
Unidentified [00:17:59]:
The heirs that you can build a company with and build a farm with.
Mark Clark [00:18:02]:
And make sure that you're not shamed out. You can have kids, you can be married. And Stanley Hauerbas.
Unidentified [00:18:08]:
And that was the culture of the Roman Empire and the pagan culture of the time. Stanley Hauerbast, who's this writer, he says.
Mark Clark [00:18:14]:
This singleness was legitimate within Christianity in the proposition, not because sex was thought to be a questionable activity, but because the mission of the church was such that between the times, the church required those who were capable of complete service to the kingdom. And we must remember that the sacrifice made by the single is not that of giving up sex, but the more significant sacrifices of this of giving up heirs. There can be no more radical act than this, as it is the clearest institutional expression that one's future is not guaranteed by the family, but by the church. That's what he's saying. He's saying, listen, the spiritual reality of the kingdom is actually more important than any kind of idol that we've created in modern culture about the family. We think the family's the ultimate thing. Having a spouse is gonna give me meaning. Having kids is gonna give me meaning.
Mark Clark [00:19:14]:
He comes along and he says, at that moment, you've forgotten that the spiritual reality of relationships is thicker than. Which is why Jesus in Mark, chapter two, he's healing and he's in a house and it's rammed. And they come in and they go, hey, your mom and your sister are here. They're here to talk to your brothers. And he looks at them and he says, who are my mother and my brothers and my sisters? But those who do the will of the God, those who are bringing in the kingdom of God. That's his point. He says, this family called the church, in between the times when Jesus rose and between the time he rises, it comes back together again. This family called the church actually in many ways transcends that of the blood family.
Mark Clark [00:19:55]:
So much so people see what he's trying to do. He's trying to give an apologetic, and.
Unidentified [00:20:01]:
I'm trying to give you one, about the beauty and the goodness of singleness to affirm.
Mark Clark [00:20:05]:
We have probably 800 single people, maybe more, 1500 single people in our church. I'm trying to look at you and affirm your life. This is not plan B. Some of you, yes, you're gonna get married. 96% of people tend to get married because they're weak, too horny, it's twice. But some of you, you gotta recognize there's an affirmation on your life. And he's saying, not everybody should get married. Have you seen a marriage where you looked at them and said, my goodness, they would have saved themselves a lot of pain and agony if they did not been married.
Mark Clark [00:20:46]:
That's what Paul's saying. Not everybody should get married. Guys, I've been doing premarital counseling for 20 years almost. And believe me, There's a percentage of these couples that I look at and I say, you shouldn't have got married.
Unidentified [00:21:00]:
That's what Paul's saying. Save yourself the strife, the agony, the destruction. Set yourself aside.
Mark Clark [00:21:08]:
It's what Jesus called in Matthew, chapter 19. You know, there's this paradigm.
Unidentified [00:21:11]:
He called it eunuchs for the kingdom. A eunuch was someone who cut their organs off, dedicated themselves to pietism, to religion or whatever. And Jesus actually, in Matthew 19, says, There will be eunuchs for the kingdom. He didn't mean literally. He just meant people who set aside their life and their time and their money and their energy toward the advancement of the kingdom instead of toward civilian pursuits. And that's his point, that it's a viable way of life. One writer has said it this way.
Mark Clark [00:21:39]:
One of the clear differences between Christianity.
Unidentified [00:21:41]:
And other religions is Christianity's entertainment of the idea of singleness as the paradigm way of life for its followers. Not everyone should get married. That's the reality. Things can get done.
Mark Clark [00:21:56]:
Now, some of you might go, yeah, yeah, yeah, but if I'm not married, I'm not gonna produce.
Unidentified [00:21:59]:
I'm not gonna do anything of value in the world. Let me tell you something. So you guys know my favorite writer, C.S. lewis, right? Clearly produced some things in his life. Oxford professor, wrote some of the biggest things. Most popular books in the history of western culture. Was 58, before he got married. Only married four years.
Unidentified [00:22:22]:
Joy Davidson, she died of cancer four years after they got married. Crushed him. He got some things done even though he wasn't married, even though he was single. You can produce now. I read something. I was reading a book called the Inklings, about the Inklings the other day, which was C.S. lewis and Tolkien and Charles Williams. They used to sit around at a pub in England and talk about and read each other their notes and ideas and that kind of stuff.
Unidentified [00:22:49]:
I've talked to you about them before. And here was a note that Lewis wrote in his diary one night. He says, this is a really important point. Those are the golden sessions.
Mark Clark [00:23:03]:
When our slippers are on our feet.
Unidentified [00:23:05]:
Spread out toward the blaze and our drinks at our elbows. When the whole world and something beyond the world opens itself to our minds as we talk. All of us are in those moments, free men and equals, as if we had first met an hour ago, while at the same time an affection mellowed by the years, unfolds us. Life, natural life. Listen to this. Has no better gift to give. Who could have deserved it? See, what he's saying is.
Mark Clark [00:23:39]:
Sex is.
Unidentified [00:23:40]:
Not the greatest gift the world has to offer. He's talking about buddies that he hangs out with, friends as he sits by the fire, and he opens up ideas. He's saying, marriage, you know, the world is a pretty amazing, expansive place and.
Mark Clark [00:23:55]:
Actually the most transcendent thing. Now, hear what I'm saying here, because.
Unidentified [00:24:00]:
The church doesn't talk like this, okay?
Mark Clark [00:24:03]:
That the most transcendent things in the.
Unidentified [00:24:05]:
World don't actually happen in the context of marriage. They're deeper than that. Sometimes they happen outside of the context of marriage.
Mark Clark [00:24:14]:
Sometimes, like, there's. Listen, don't take this wrong way.
Unidentified [00:24:19]:
I love my wife, okay?
Mark Clark [00:24:20]:
I love her. She's amazing.
Unidentified [00:24:21]:
She's.
Mark Clark [00:24:22]:
I couldn't be married to anyone else. She's unreal. The love, the friendship, the connection. We're just, like, perfect for each other and everyone. She's amazing, amazing, amazing. But to be honest with you, some of the best things that I experience in my life are not with her. Right? Let's just admit that. I know.
Mark Clark [00:24:44]:
We don't want to admit. There's no.
Unidentified [00:24:45]:
Honey, honey, it's always you. It's always you. It's me and you. It's always you.
Mark Clark [00:24:48]:
You blow my mind.
Unidentified [00:24:49]:
It's amazing. Every great thing I experience is with you.
Mark Clark [00:24:53]:
But to be honest, I experience.
Unidentified [00:24:54]:
There's moments I'm having a talk with four guy friends, or we're traveling and doing.
Mark Clark [00:24:59]:
Listen.
Unidentified [00:25:00]:
This week, let me tell you the most significant thing I did this week. I watched this video on Tiger woods and his return to golf. Now, I don't cry. I don't cry.
Mark Clark [00:25:13]:
Like, I don't know that I cried.
Unidentified [00:25:14]:
At my own dad's funeral, but watching this video, I bawled like a baby.
Mark Clark [00:25:20]:
The tiger is back.
Unidentified [00:25:22]:
And I'm watching it, and the music's.
Mark Clark [00:25:26]:
And the guy's. If you're not cheering for Tiger this.
Unidentified [00:25:28]:
Week, you are broken inside.
Mark Clark [00:25:30]:
And I'm like, yes. And so I, like. I, like, went behind the veil, man.
Unidentified [00:25:35]:
Like, I experienced something transcendent. I was like. I was connecting to art, man. I was connected to some bigger story. And so the most important, significant, emotional thing that happened to me that week was watching this video. So I bring this gold crystal to my wife, and I'm gonna lay it before her in a perfect environment. Cause it can't be ruined by kids going, mama, Mommy. It's like, kids are in bed.
Unidentified [00:25:59]:
Been there for a while. Watch this, honey. When I show it to her, she. She's watching. She's, like, looking away from it. I'm like, no, no, you gotta look at it. Look at it.
Mark Clark [00:26:09]:
Look.
Unidentified [00:26:09]:
Yeah, yeah. And it ends, and I'm crying again. She looks over at me, she's like, yeah, that's great. Something's wrong with you. Boom.
Mark Clark [00:26:15]:
And I'm like, what are you talking about? Just put pearls in front of swine here. A couple weeks ago, I had the great privilege, through a charitable thing, to go play pebble beach, okay?
Unidentified [00:26:28]:
Pebble beach for a golfer that is like, that's the one. That's the best golf other than Augusta. Pebble beach. That is heaven on earth for a golfer that's like. And I got invited to go, and I went and I played it, and.
Mark Clark [00:26:41]:
It was the most magical place I've.
Unidentified [00:26:42]:
Ever been in my life. And I've been to Israel. All right, save your emails. All right, so it was like. It was. There was something special. And I explained it to Aaron. I'm like, you gotta.
Unidentified [00:26:53]:
And so the next day, I'm like, you gotta come down. You gotta look at it. You gotta see.
Mark Clark [00:26:56]:
You gotta take it all in. And I take her down and I.
Unidentified [00:26:57]:
Just put her there. I'm like, look, it's Pamel. It's Pamel. She's like, why don't we go into the stores? I'm like, all right, let's go. I just can't share this with you. You don't get it.
Mark Clark [00:27:11]:
Some of the most significant things about.
Unidentified [00:27:12]:
My life and about yours are going.
Mark Clark [00:27:16]:
To be outside of the context of marriage because he's saying things of the Lord that please the Lord. Sometimes those things, the things that please the Lord, are things that you find, and they're things that you do outside of the context of hanging with your spouse.
Unidentified [00:27:30]:
That's the reality. And so Christianity, and I'm spending so much time on this one point, and it's basically just one big idea in the whole message today, because we don't talk about it and because we tend to elevate the idol of family so much so. And Christianity comes along, and those of you who are seeking Christianity and you're wondering whether you should become a Christian.
Mark Clark [00:27:51]:
And follow Jesus and follow the ways.
Unidentified [00:27:53]:
Of the New Testament. The reality is it gives us this beautiful paradigm where it says marriage is not the definitive thing, which is why.
Mark Clark [00:28:00]:
Jesus can go along and say, really.
Unidentified [00:28:01]:
There'S only, you know, maybe two legitimate reasons to divorce. Paul lists one about death.
Mark Clark [00:28:06]:
And he says if one of you.
Unidentified [00:28:07]:
Dies, you're freed up to marry again, and so on and so forth.
Mark Clark [00:28:10]:
The reason he can do that is.
Unidentified [00:28:11]:
Because he's saying Marriage isn't the most ultimate thing in the universe. Your happiness in your marriage is not actually the most important part of the most important thing in the universe.
Mark Clark [00:28:21]:
Your faithfulness and obedience to a covenant that you took is because for all the talk of victory that we have and all of our songs and all we do have victory, you gotta have victory. The reality of the Bible is about your victory. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What I care about is your obedience to what I've called you to and faithfulness to the things I've called you to. Your happiness in the context of your.
Unidentified [00:28:43]:
Marriage is not the most important question in the universe. And in heaven, there won't even be marriage. We'll all be single. And so Paul's going, look at this reality coming into the present. There's people who are set aside for this. And it's actually a beautiful thing.
Mark Clark [00:29:01]:
It's amazing.
Unidentified [00:29:02]:
I mean, my wife is such a great example of this. Cause we'll be sitting around with friends. And she said to me the other.
Mark Clark [00:29:08]:
Day, she said, you know, if anything.
Unidentified [00:29:09]:
Ever happened to you, Mark, if you.
Mark Clark [00:29:10]:
Died, I would never marry again. Isn't it nice when your spouse says that? It's so nice. So then I said it too, and then everyone laughed that I was having dinner with. She's like, I would never marry again. And everyone's like, mm, yeah.
Unidentified [00:29:27]:
And all the women are like, yep, I wouldn't either.
Mark Clark [00:29:29]:
And then I'm like, and honey, if you died, I would never marry again.
Unidentified [00:29:33]:
And everyone, bah.
Mark Clark [00:29:35]:
You'd be married in a year, easy. Why? Cause you're weak.
Unidentified [00:29:50]:
Beautiful reality is, Jesus as a single man comes, and somehow we've created something where singleness is a parasite. It's negative, it's something to run from. And Paul, big idea, Pretty simple. He lays out a situation. A single man changed the world, died for the world, took on the wrath of God for the world, gave himself up for the world. Paul is saying, I wish you were like me more, because I am giving my life to it too. And so he says, the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband.
Unidentified [00:30:35]:
And he goes on to say the reverse. And the reality is, what is our life supposed to be defined by the things of the Lord becoming holy in body and spirit. That is more important to Jesus than any kind of human relationship we might have. Some of you, you simply have the wrong goal. You have started to care more about your marriage than you do about Jesus. You have started to care, care about the things of the world, the worldly influences, the civilian pursuits, more than the one who calls you and says, you have a short amount of time on.
Mark Clark [00:31:13]:
This planet, use it for me versus for yourself.
Unidentified [00:31:18]:
And the things that you can see around you, those are temporal things. They're not infinite things, they're not eternal things. It means all you're caring about is your 76 years versus your 76 million. And Paul wants to flip it before he moves on to the next chapter and he lands it and he says, there's beautiful things about marriage. Verse one to five. But let me stop and pivot for like 30 verses and tell you there's a beautiful thing about singleness. And those of you are single, know God may have you there for life. And that would be beautiful.
Unidentified [00:31:56]:
Let me pray for us, Father. This one big idea needs to be reiterated over and over again to our brains because in our experience we miss it and we elevate the idol of family, the idol of kids. And Jesus constantly pushed back against a conservative culture religiously that did that and.
Mark Clark [00:32:22]:
Said, yes, there are pagan idols that.
Unidentified [00:32:24]:
Will ruin your life, but there are religious idols that can ruin your life.
Mark Clark [00:32:28]:
Things that are good, things like family.
Unidentified [00:32:31]:
That become God, things and destroy your soul. And the mission I have you on in the world and I just pray we as a church are very clear to prioritize the things you are calling us to versus the things the people around us are calling us to. That we would be a church on mission in every way. If we are married with families that we would love and serve them unto the glory of God for the good of the world, that people would come to know you and that maybe actually some people right now the thing they need to do is go, I am married. I've got off mission in that way. I'm not good at that. I don't have the right priorities. Do that work among my family and who I am.
Unidentified [00:33:16]:
And then those of you who are single and you're feeling honestly pressure and like second class citizens that you would know that God is saying, you are beloved. I am well pleased you follow my son. You do not follow the pressure and the opinions of the people around you. I have you where you are to do amazing things. You are freed up in ways that married people aren't. Make the most of it in this moment for the sake of the kingdom. Do that among us in Jesus great name we pray. Amen.